Waking up after Heart Surgery

I have a vivid memory of waking up post-op.

There was a tube in my throat and even though I was getting air from a ventilator, it feel like I was not breathing.

That was a terrible few seconds until my mind cleared and the realization of what was going on sunk in.

A nurse started speaking to me as soon as my eyes opened. She explained where I was and what was going on. She said she would remove the tube and not to worry, then began doing so.

All told, it was probably only a matter of seconds from waking up not breathing on my own to having the tube removed but it seemed timeless.

It was an indescribable feeling that was quickly replaced by a whole new set of sensations when I took my first deep breath on my own.

It wasn't really painful, I was still too drugged and dopey to feel much pain but it was unpleasant. I felt like I needed to cough but couldn't get enough volume of air into my lungs to do it.

Then I fell back asleep or into a dreamy doze. People came and went but I couldn't really focus on what was happening.

The next time the world came in to clear focus I was out of the Post-Op Intensive Care Unit. It was the day after surgery and I was in a ward with a handful of others all just starting to come around too. This was an intermediate stop before being put in a Cardiac Recovery ward.

I felt like crap to put it bluntly. My lungs felt like they were full of liquid, my chest hurt and my mind was still foggy from the anesthesia and painkillers. My only task that day was to try and cough as much as I could to clear my lungs. Easier said than done.

The unit nurse would come around every few minutes to encourage a cough and see how I was doing. I hadn't had anything to eat yet, only liquids. I felt nauseous but gamely tried to eat a cracker. That didn't work out too well and the pain as I emptied my stomach was shocking.

Throwing up seemed to mark a turning point and even though I was miserable, I started to come around. My mind was clearing. I hurt but it was bearable. The lungs were the worst because the only way to clear them was deep breaths and coughing which expanded the chest and the split sternum. That was the most painful part of the ordeal.

The next day, or maybe later that night, I was moved to the Cardiac Recovery Ward. It was a normal hospital ward with six beds and a nurse on duty day and night.

We were all in rough shape I guess. Each of us had undergone the same surgery within days of each other.

That is where the real recovery began.